In my previous post, we talked about the magic of syncing up and how it can calm a child who has had an unpleasant experience. In this post, I want to describe how this technique can also positively influence your child's discipline and make them more likely to listen to you.

Let me illustrate with a story I witnessed: I was shopping in a large grocery store. Not far from me, a dad was shopping with his young daughter, putting items in their cart. The little girl, who seemed about three years old, kept saying, "Daddy, buy me this, Daddy, buy me that, I want this, and I want that." Sound familiar?

The dad responded patiently, telling her he had a shopping list and only bought what was on his list. (Don't worry, there were kid-friendly items in the cart. But you know how it is, kids want the whole store 😉).

They reached the checkout line, where the most tempting items are strategically placed to entice customers to grab extra snacks while waiting. Once again, the little girl started, "Daddy, buy me this, I want that… and that… actually, I want this too…" Here, I saw something wonderful.

The dad knelt down to her level, looked calmly into her eyes, and said in a gentle voice, "Daddy is not buying that now. Daddy is only buying what's on the list." And… silence. Suddenly, the girl got it.

What happened?

He was saying the same thing he had been saying throughout the shopping trip.

Why did it work? The answer, again, is syncing up—matching.

This method of synchronization is actually a communication technique. It helps make communication clearer, and as we saw, it works wonders.

This can be great in situations when a child is acting out or maybe hitting their siblings.

You can simply get down to their level,

look them in the eyes, and say in a calm tone,

"I do not allow hitting."

You can repeat this again.

If the child is very upset, you can gently hold him on both sides, keeping their arms at their sides, and calmly repeat the statement twice.

This works wonders.

First, it helps the child understand what is being asked of them because, as I mentioned, it's about clear communication. Besides that, this action conveys a lot of support and containment. Sometimes, it's just what they need.

I highly recommend trying this out.

I'd love to hear what you think.